Working in a convenience store can be a dangerous occupation, and I'm not talking about armed robbery. Even legitimate customers can pose a threat:

Tony Carr wanted to pay for his burger. Instead, police say, he ended up smooshing the microwaved patty in a store clerk's face. Police have issued an arrest warrant for Carr, 37, of Berwick, Maine. He's charged with simple assault and criminal mischief, both misdemeanors.

Investigators say Carr got angry on Nov. 28 when the clerk at a Cumberland Farms would not allow him to pay for a hamburger while it was heating in the store microwave. Police said the clerk, Scott Litzenberger, told Carr he had to bring the burger to the counter 15 feet away to pay for it.

After a sharp exchange of words, the man walked back to the microwave, removed the steaming burger and walked back to Litzenberger.

The two apparently exchanged a few brief words again, when the customer, "just lost it," according to another clerk. Instead of paying for it, Carr shoved it into the clerk's face, burning his face and eye, police Sgt. Anthony Triano said.

As part of our commitment to public service, the following chart is designed to help convenience store clerks recognize which customers they can be rude to, and which customers should be treated with a measure of civility:

Customer Classification by Microwaved Product
Dangerous	Harmless
Hamburger	Cigarettes
Hot Pockets	Gummi Worms
Twinkies	Stick of Butter
Crescent Wrench	Aged Beef Jerky
Bic Lighters	Toilet Paper
Pizza	Icee
Brake Fluid	Newspaper
Red Bull	Corndog

We understand that this list is far from complete. Additional entries may be suggested in the comments.